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**This post has been updated as of 2/8/08 - read all the way to the bottom to see my fufill the request of a commenter from Fark.com!**
Let me preface this by saying if you are:
- Easily offended
- Easily grossed out
- Have a rotten sense of humor
Stop reading NOW and go elsewhere.
The rest of you still with me? Good…you’re going to enjoy this story! It all started a month ago, before my trip to Amsterdam. I decided to head to the after Christmas sale at the Old Navy in my town and get new pants for the trip. I found two pairs (same style, different colors) on sale and after trying on one pair, bought them and took them home.
I am not a “wash clothes before I wear them” type of person. Well, I am now, but I didn’t used to be that way. In fact, I’ve made fun of my husband on more than one occasion because he would wash brand new clothes that had obviously never even been tried on! I saw it a waste of time, especially when you could see the crease marks in a brand new shirt, or the pants still had the tages and size sticker attached.
So I head home from Old Navy with my new pairs of pants - the green pair I tried on in the store, and the brown pair in the same size that I didn’t try on. A few days later, I put the pants on so that I could head out. I had the pants on all of 10 minutes before deciding I should hit the toilet before leaving the house…just like I tell my kids, you always potty before you go out. As I sit down on the can, pants down around my knees, I noticed something odd in the crotch area of the inside of the pants.
So….hypothetical question for my readers:
If you bought new pants from the Old Navy, and as you went to put them on, noticed a VAGINAL DISCHARGE in the crotch, that was crusty, and NOT BELONGING TO YOU, would you:
A. Return the pants to Old Navy for a new pair of pants, no questions asked?
B. Call the media, and get noticed, and get more from Old Navy for your trouble?
C: Call a lawyer, and bank big on your pain and suffering?
Yes folks, I’m not making this up - upon closer inspection, there was DRIED vaginal discharge in the crotch of these new pants, and it wasn’t MINE!
EWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW!
I can’t even describe HOW grossed out I was. Now, I’m a mom, and I’ve dealt with a lot of gross things over the years. I’ve wiped butts and caught vomit in my hands to prevent it from landing on the carpet. I’ve had a child who needed a catheter due to an injury, and I was in charge of emptying out the pee bag. On top of all that, I have a sick sense of humor. But to think that I had these nasty pants on for 10 minutes, with someone else’s…dried juices…near my underwear, and next to that, my nether regions? I was disgusted.
The tag had been missing from this pair of brown pants, so I deduced that someone (henceforth referred to as “juicy bitch”) bought the pants, wore them commando for several hours, and then returned them to Old Navy for a refund. Old Navy obviously didn’t take a close look at the pants, and put them back on the rack, where I picked them up.
About a week later, I finally had the time to go back to Old Navy to return the pants. Realizing that this was a sensitive issue, I asked for a manager at the checkout counter and attempted to be reasonably discreet when I spoke to her. It wasn’t pretty. The manager was SO defensive and although she did say “I’m sorry” once, her attitude was horrible! She made me feel like I was in the wrong for being disgusted about the pants. She wasn’t empathetic at all and it went badly, with excuse after excuse about WHY it could have happened, instead of saying, “I’m so sorry, how horrible, let me take care of this for you.” She actually said, “Well, it’s not as if we did this on PURPOSE!” Sheesh lady, I never said you did, I just want you to know so you can prevent this in the future!
Realizing I was getting nowhere fast, I quietly told her I would call corporate to express my dismay, and her response was “Go ahead!”. Nice! So I did, literally dialing their number on the way out of the store. The rep there WAS empathetic and understanding, and promised that she’d have the district manager call me. I told her I had planned to return two items and shop in ON tonight, but after dealing with the manager, I was so turned off I left. I felt mortified when she was talking to me, and I was so embarrassed that she reacted like I was somehow in the wrong for expecting to buy clean clothes! I don’t even want to go back to the store.
To make the rest of a long story short, I never heard from a district manager. I did hear back from the Old Navy rep at corporate who apologized again, and sent me a $50 gift card for my troubles, and told me I didn’t need to return the pants. (Um, yeah, cause I’m going to wash them and wear them after this?) The pants were close to $20, so the end result here is that Old Navy puts my value as a customer at $30. I think Old Navy blew it. I should have been contacted by the district manager in this area, and I should have been reassured that this will never happen again to anyone.
I’m now auctioning the snail trail pants off on eBay. If you’re in the market for a pair of light brown wide leg size 2 pants, complete with someone else’s vaginal discharge in the crotch, please check out my eBay auction! (Note: eBay auction now gone due to being reported by internet police….*snicker*. Apparently selling items with bodily fluids on them is against eBay policy, but not Old Navy policy! If you happened to screen shot the auction before it was removed, let me know! Maybe you’re a fetish freak who is into user underwear and the like - these pants are just as good! If you have no need for this item, please feel free to Stumble and Digg this post. Email it to your friends as a warning to ALWAYS check out the new clothes they buy, and ALWAYS wash the new clothes you buy. If you don’t, you may find someone else’s bodily fluids a bit too close for comfort!
(Don’t forget to Digg this post!)
Edited to add: Holy crap! As of 4:41 eastern time, Thursday 2/7/08, my eBay auction already has 477 views. It’s been up for 4 hours.
Hi to all of my visitors from The Consumerist! You’ve got questions, I’ve got answers:
1. She can’t just wash them now and then wear them? She now has to sell them on Ebay? Once they’re washed they should be fine - why not just keep them?
Ick. I’m not even touching them. I originally took the pictures to show my friends, so they could share in my mortification. The pants are in a bag, and I don’t think I would ever be comfortable wearing them, no matter how much hot water and bleach I used.
2. It’s not clear (1) why she’d take there “eww” pants back after trying to return them to the store and (2) why she’d photograph and list them on Ebay for a profit. does she really thing someone wants them? And a BIN for $50, come on!
I didn’t get satisfaction with the store manager, so I kept the pants when I called corporate. I thought eventually I’d be returning them and speaking to the district manager. I’m not really selling them for a profit - note the 99 cents. This is about drawing attention to what happened.
3. Had those pants been returned by someone else that way and been put back on the rack? Or were they tried on briefly by a woman who just enjoyed the Old Navy experience a little too much?
I think someone bought them, wore them, and returned them.
4. 50 bucks buyout….That’s soooo Quagmire.
I had to pick a number. Giggity, giggity, giggity, giggity!
5. I’m confused…so Old Navy wouldn’t let her return the jeans? Why did she leave the store with them? Why is she selling them on Ebay? Was she trying to extort additional money from the store manager and that’s why she’s saying that her business is only worth $30 to Old Navy? There’s no way in hell I’d leave the store with those nasty things still in my hand so I’m thinking that she didn’t want to just return them, she wanted money and not “gift card” money. …I’m such a pessimist…
I never got to the point of return with the first manager. Corporate told me to keep them, burn them, throw them away - they didn’t care. Given my experience, I didn’t think the gift card was a fair trade.
6. I just reported the auction to eBay. We’ll see how long it takes them to pull the listing.
Party pooper.
7. Wouldn’t this have been noticed before purchase when the shopper tried on the clothes?
I bought two pairs, same size, same style. I tried on one, but not the other.
Updated again 2/8/08 - this link has hit Fark and it’s been stated that the story is useless without a picture. You asked for it!
This entry was posted on Thursday, February 7th, 2008 at 1:00 pm and is filed under Bitchy-Poo, Buy Me!. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.





No Way!
That is the most disgusting thing I had ever heard. I am disturbed by it so much– because I NEVER wash my clothes before wearing them for the first time.
Only you could tell this story like you did. I was grossed out AND laughing at the same time.
I just threw up a little in my mouth.
I’m glad you enjoyed it Melissa - I don’t mind people laughing at my expense.
Tim, you were warned. And hey, how do you think I FELT?
I don’t know whether to laugh, cry, or vomit!!! OMG! This would ONLY happen to you Colleen!!!
ROFL
Wash them and wear them, baby. I mean, you buy clothes from Goodwill You can do it!
That is still the most disgusting story I have ever heard! I will FOREVER wash new clothes, and will FOREVER check for crotch juice!
Ooh Kim, Ooh, I wash those Goodwill clothes though. And having seen the uh…trace evidence…this feels different.
Tara, perhaps, do all 3?
Jules - word. You never know what a juicy bitch will do.
I’m once again reminded why I’m glad I’m a man.
Nice post, grossing people out. Who do you think you are, me?
I can totally see someone trying them on, having an “incident”, and hurriedly putting the pants back. It’s gross, but it doesn’t surprise me.
What DOES surprise and shock me is the response you got from the manager. I am totally appalled.
I’ll not be shopping at Old Navy again.
Ummm, excuse me while I go check out all my clothes I just bought.
Fab, trust me. This was the result of someone wearing those pants commando for a good 8 hours, at least!
Okay, as a woman who has worn pants commando in the past, I have never once left a juicy trail behind. You have to question the previous owners personal hygeine standards if they crust up their pants.
Blech.
Just wash them!!! If you’re really this upset may I also suggest you NEVER eat out again? It’s easier to clean clothes then food
Also, if you do get bids on your auction, DO NOT send it through USPS. They don’t want you to send “filthy” stuff through the US mail system. little more info
I am LOL! And totally grossed at the same time.
Taking the Shopping Oath of Colleen Now:
I will ALWAYS WASH NEW CLOTHES BEFORE I WEAR THEM. I will not make fun of my hubby’s need to wash clothes before wearing. I will glance inside the crotch of every pant, before I put them on. I will file the “Colleen Incident” for future reference, upon shopping at Old Navy and use her experience to make better more educated choices. If I have an incident in a pair of jeans while trying them on, I will not leave them for the next poor soul to find - I will make my hubby buy them, since it is most likely his fault (or Keith Urbans).
OMG that’s disgusting! I”m glad you hadn’t had the pants on long and were home when you discovered the crusty crotch. Yuck. Imagine if you were already away from home when you discovered it? Yheesh!
I can’t believe how they treated you at Old Navy either. I’ve never given them much business, but I definitely won’t be a customer there again.
That is gross. I am stumbling your post since Old Navy sucked for you.
Tricia, trust me - if I had been out wearing the pants when I discovered this, I would have been driving home in just my underwear.
Amazing. Absolutely amazing. I don’t shop at Old Navy and now I probably never will. I am even more appalled at how the manager of the store treated you after bringing this to attention.
How much do you want to bet that the manager didn’t make this noted to other employees? I would have. “Please check ALL returned clothing for bodily fluid. No exceptions.”
The snail trail! That title is hysterical!
What happened to you is really gross though. I’ll be checking inside from now on.
And you may or may not guess what I thought I read when I got to the comment about eating out. I almost spit my water on my monitor.
Stumbled.
We wear bathing suits a lot in Hawaii I have eight or nine of them. Last time I shopped for suits I found one that had evidence fo previous wear - and not just crotch juice if you know what I mean. I know it’s hard to tell if a suit fits right when you try it on over underwear, but … ick! Disgusting!
And I hope eBay doesn’t pyull your auction!
ebay pulled it…
And the manager should have taken them back…I find that absurd…
OMG that is so disgusting. I’m definitely going to be double and triple checking anything I buy. I always do when I shop at Goodwill and thrift stores, but I tend to assume that I’m buying something from a store it’s good and clean. Urgh.
I’ve dugg, and I’ll stumble shortly and share this around I’ve already told a couple of family members. Next the blogsphere.
Julie sent me a message on DIgg about this-oh. my. GOD! That is SO DISGUSTING. I’m not sure I ever want to shop for pants again!
Are you the same size as Britney Spears? You know, it’s just a theory. . .
EW! I would have been just as disgusted! And it takes ALOT to gross me out.
Thank you for sharing your awful experience with us all and for your to-the-point story telling style. I’ve never been a “wash before I wear” type of person either but from now on, I’ll think twice before I do THAT again.
As a fellow mom and someone who also has a sick sense of humor, I can’t even begin to imagine how I would have felt/reacted had this happened to me. I might have even gone as far as to demand that they disclose the names of all the females who returned light brown wide leg size 2 (I hate you by the way :oP) pants so I could track the nasty skeeze down and bit#@ slap her.
Part of me can’t stop wondering if tread-marks (you know, in the back) would have been more, less, or equally as disgusting. Personally, I think I could handle a little butt paste much more gracefully than the vag juice of some unknown, panty-less dischage factory. (Please pardon my crassness.)
OMG! Thank goodness YOU didn’t put them on commando before you noticed! UUGGHH!! I’m thoroughly disgusted…I actually talked to someone on the phone tonight (with a similar kind of story, not near as gross) and she said I HAD to read this!! Your storytelling is unmatched!
ewwwww.
How do you know it was vaginal fluid? It’s quite trendy for Guys to wear girl pants now. There is even a YouTube video of Neko Case making a public appeal for them to stop.
I am not offended, but I am bit peeved that I am now song-tagged with a Neil Diamond song.
BOOOOO to the loser who reported the ebay auction.
I bet that was the girl who soiled them in the first place.
Came back to say I just saw this story linked on FARK! I hope that Old Navy manager is getting a talking to.
OMG!! Nasty nasty nasty! Where did this happen? How can we find out if the manager got fired? where can we sign a petition to get her fired? i’ve HAD it with rude salespeople - don’t like your job? get another one! don’t berate customers because you suck at life!!
You go on with your bad self, Colleen - i’m emailing this link to all my friends - especially the one who’s husband is a manager at Anchor Blue!
whose husband, i mean - not who’s husband.
Hey, at least you had the barrier of your panties ‘tween you and the crust. Just thinking on the positive side here!
Aaaacckkkk… now I have this awful picture in my mind - at least food will remain unappealing to me for a few hours - so thanks for sharing, I guess.
Perhaps you should have some DNA testing done on this stain - it might be famous…
GROSS, GROSS, GROSS
I am so happy I cant fit into there clothes!
I worked customer service in another chain store and I would have had no problem taking it back and marking it defective. Not only is that gross, but it’s a health hazard.
You should have gotten a lot more then what you got from them. I have seen people get more for a lot less.
Baaaahahaha! That is SICK. I worked at Old Navy about 10 years ago, when I was in college, for extra Christmas money during the holiday. Wearing the stupid headset was bad enough, but the punk manager was even worse. Condescending, rude. She wanted me to rearrange the “jean wall” (which was in absolute ruins) at 8 a.m. I quit right there. Beh. Old Navy.
Every teenager knows that Old Navy is great to buy clothes for one night out. They accept returns no questions asked.
I don’t like their clothes as it doesn’t fit very well. For instance on a man the crotch area just has too much material and comes down too far. This looks somewhat sloppy and is just a symptom of cheap clothing.
Some of my friends always have something new on and Old Navy is the preferred. Next comes Sears
Got this link forwarded by me SO who never washes his recently purchased clothes before he wears them. On the other hand, I do - so Steve, ya gonna wash your clothes now??
But just think - if you *did* wash your clothes prior to wearing them, you’d have missed out on an excellent blog post.
I feel your pain on this. I do always wash clothes before I wear them. But I have a similar story–I once tried on swimsuits at Ross, didn’t buy any, and two days later I had a case of crabs. I wore my underwear and everything while trying them on, and I was not sexually active at the time, nor had I slept anywhere different or used unfamiliar towels. I can only conclude that some nasty ho had tried on one of the suits I did and some of the creepy crawlies survived on the crotch. Since then, I’ve bought all my swimsuits through mail order and wash them in the hottest water possible before wearing.
I’d laugh if they’re reading this right now. XD
It was gross. However,, ARE you sure that it is vaginal discharge and not a guy’s discharge? Somehow that’s even worse. Yuuuuuuuuk
All I can say is…EWWWWW. That’s the grossest story I’ve heard in a long time and will definitely affect where I shop and what I look for when I shop. GAWD.
I’m actually surprised at how many people commented (on the other site) and didn’t understand that this wasn’t about not being able to return the pants or something….Why are people so damn stupid?
why dont yo go ahead and just GROW A PAIR. how pathetic that this much content was devoted to such a topic.
There was another site where a guy was extremely mad at the “customer service” he received from an airline, and his rantings got so much attention that the airline contacted him through their legal dept. I think they offered him a cash settlement to STFU. Wonder what the Old Navy higher-ups will do when they see this…. And I am now a convert, I hereby promise to always wash new clothes for me and my famiily, once I know they fit. Also, maybe this was covered by someone else, but why would you want to wear pants with no underwear? I don’t get the appeal. I can understand a skirt or dress, but pants?
Hey Mysterese, I’m female, so “growing a pair” is not only physically impossible, but not something I wish to do. Can you grow a sense of humor in the meantime?
ohmygod. i have always been a freak about washing clothes before i wear them, mainly because they’re just itchy and uncomfortable to me if i haven’t washed them yet. and bathing suits and underwear are two items that i will NEVER wear before washing. but man, these are just some freakin’ pants! yuck, oh yuck. guh-ross. i think i’ll digg this and see how far it gets, colleen.
Haha that’s some nasty shit right there, wash them babies THEN sell them on ebay, then at lest they’re not in your closet… or you could just take them outside, squirt some lighterfluid on them, and light those crotch rot pants right up into flames
I’m wondering how many military personnel and families come across your story while trying to Google information related to their “Navy Discharge”.
Hi, I just wanted to let you know they said “if you follow the snail trail” during the Nascar race and it sent me into a fit of giffles. Thanks for that. LOL.
Years ago, my MIL told me to wash clothes before wearing them. She used to work as a seamstress and she said that we have no clue where that material has been. She’s right. I mean, many of these clothes are made in China. How do we know how they’ve been transported or how the material was stored in the factory. There could have been rats on the clothing. We just don’t know.
I am officially never shopping at old navy again. And if I do, I will check EVERYTHING!! Even for other stores. Wow. I’m officially scared to buy new clothes now.
Ewwwwwww.